I struggle with both depression and anxiety, everyone who knows me has seen my wild and uncontrollable emotional rollercoaster. Those of us that have the ability to share our turmoil find the support that we need to make it through the day. Our darkest moments have a beacon of hope that shines a way through the darkness. While we know we don’t have the ability to make it through another moment, we find ourselves in the presence of the people who can manage to help us live through the moments that could end our lives if we were alone. It requires great strength to accept the hand that offers assistance when it would be easier to crawl into a dark place and die. It takes tremendous courage to ask for help. It takes vulnerability to accept the hug when we need it most. It takes the most amount of courage to cry and allow others to see us when we are at our weakest point.
Most people are quick to laugh and make fun of people when they are hurt, breaking people down is easier than taking the time to lift them up. It is more socially acceptable. Besides, this behavior gets more likes than someone who extends their hand and themselves to help the people that need them.
I decided to write this post when one of my favorite people told me they often contemplate killing themselves. They told me that no one knew their little secret. I won’t go into their story. I will just share mine.
I first attempted suicide when I was 16 years old. This was not an attention seeking action, I never told anyone what I was planning, I never threw words that were intended to hurt. My actions were intended to only hurt one person, the person I saw when I looked in the mirror.
Since that day I have been blessed with the personality to have people feel safe enough with me to share their darkest secrets. I have learned to listen to the “voice” that tells me to look for someone who needs me. When I meditate every morning I ask for guidance and to be open to be there for the one person whom I can help. So today I turn to social media. If you need help ask for it, there are people who love you and who want you on this planet.